Shackled Wings (Persona 5: Chapter 4)

Personally, I would rather not dwell on our visit to Shujin. The morning after we arrived, Sakura-san drove us to the school, although he told us that it was only going to be a one-time thing and we’ll have to start taking the subways from tomorrow onwards. To be fair, he does have a business to run and possibly many other things he needed to take care of. But his attitude towards Big Brother hadn’t thawed out overnight. When we reached the school gate, he turned to my brother and me and made sure he had our attention.

“Do me a favor and behave yourselves, all right?” Sakura-san gave Big Brother a pointed glare. “Don’t get me wrong – I don’t care what happens to you. Just don’t cause me or your sister any trouble. She went through a lot of trouble to come here with you, so don’t screw it up.” He then turned to me and his expression softened, but his frown didn’t leave. “And do your best to get along with the teachers. Even though you got lucky and managed to get in, they still had to pull an awful lot of strings to make this possible. Don’t do anything that will get you or your brother expelled.” Sakura-san fixed his steel gaze on both of us. “Understand?”

We both nod at him without a word. Seemingly satisfied, Sakura-san lead us towards the school. My stomach churned and I dearly wished I had a book with me. Just holding one was enough to calm my nerves when approaching a new challenge. However, since I was only going to be introduced to the teachers and Big Brother was coming with me, I thought that it wouldn’t be a problem. We were just going to go to school and then back to the café. But apparently my nerves wanted to poke fun at me today.

I glanced at Big Brother’s hand, wishing that we were children again so that us holding hands wouldn’t seem weird to society. The only reason why we held hands yesterday was because we were in an unfamiliar place and we needed to stick together at all costs. However, since we are almost adults, no longer children, we have to let go of the habit. Well, more so it was I that had to be rid of the habit. I didn’t want to do anything to embarrass Big Brother after all. Or do anything that would jeopardize his future.

Suddenly, my head was being patted and then my hand was secure in another one. I shift my gaze to Big Brother and he smiled as we walked after Sakura-san.

‘We’ve got this,’ his eyes said as he squeezed my hand. I smiled and nodded, but felt a strange mix of guilt and relief in my stomach. Big Brother, sensitive to my needs as always, came to my rescue. But I was supposed to be the one protecting him. And here I am.

Finally, we reached the office doors. Sakura-san looked over his shoulder and acted as if he was going to say something. He scrunched his face at our hands and shook his head with an exasperated sigh. Heat burst through my own face and I stole my hand away from Big Brother’s.

“You two are supposed to be high school students. Act like it,” he whispered. It wouldn’t be good if the teachers overheard his scolding and endangered our first impression as somewhat upstanding students.

We stepped inside the principal’s office and began our introductions. Sakura-san got to work signing the appropriate papers and I observe the principal in his chair and the teacher next to him. The principal was a bigger man with a bald head and impeccable, if not slightly colorful, attire. Dad would have approved of his neatness, but he and Mom would have clucked at the sight of the teacher next to the principal. She was pretty, but her hair was a mess and her manner of attire was more laid-back than what my parents’ idea of a teacher would be. And if I wasn’t mistaken, there were bags under her eyes. Did she not sleep well last night like Big Brother? He had mentioned something about a dream where he was in a jail cell and a blue room but he couldn’t tell me more because we had to get to school and he still couldn’t seem to wrap his mind around it.

“To reiterate, just so we’re clear, you will immediately be expelled if you cause any problems,” the principal warned Big Brother, “Honestly, I hesitated on accepting someone like you, but there were circumstances on our side…” He looked towards me. “And considering what trouble we had to go through in order to accommodate your parents’ wishes, I would hope you understand your own predicament.” Then he focused on the both of us. “You two might have done a variety of things in hiding in your hometown, but you will behave yourselves here. If you are thrown out from our school, there will be no place for you to go. Keep that in mind.”

The principal gestured towards the tired-looking teacher. “This is the teacher in charge of your classes.”

She nodded. “I’m Sadayo Kawakami. Here are your student IDs.” Kawakami-sensei placed the IDs on the table and Big Brother leaned over to take them, handing mine over to me. “Be sure to read the school rules. Any violations will send you straight to the guidance office. And, if by chance you cause any problems, I won’t be able to protect neither of you at all.” She tilted her head towards the principal. “…That IS your promise, yes, Principal Kobayakawa?”

It took almost everything I had to not grind my teeth and yell at the two as Kawakami-sensei whined about why it had to be her in charge of Big Brother’s homeroom and my Japanese language class and not someone else. I could understand the principal being wary of us due to my brother’s record, and Sakura-san already made it clear enough that I was in a bit of trouble too, so I didn’t need him to patronize me. But the teacher? The person who was supposed to care about their student and help them succeed despite the odds and difficulties ahead of them? At this point, I had lost any sympathy for her tiredness or any “trouble” the principal had to go through. I just wanted to go back to the café and lose myself in a good book. At least now I know the lay of the land and the opposition I’m up against.

Salvation came when Sakura-san asked if we could leave, gave reassurances that he’ll remind us to not get into any trouble, and headed out of the office.

“They’re treating you two like some kinda nuisance… I guess that’s what it means to have a criminal record. Turns out your past follows you wherever you go.” Sakura-san sighed and rubbed the back of his head. Was that a hint of sympathy in his voice? I couldn’t tell underneath his usual gruffness. “By the way…if you get expelled now, I won’t hesitate to kick you out. Got it?”

“I’ll be careful,” Big Brother affirmed, playing with the front strands of his hair out of habit. I breathed out through my nose, perhaps a little more loudly than I would have liked, because Sakura-san shifted his attention from Big Brother to me. He didn’t say anything but it looked like he wanted to. Instead, he shook his head and sighed himself.

“School never changes, huh…?”

***

Sadayo Kawakami sighed heavily and slumped her shoulders as she trudged through the connecting hallway from one part of the school to the other. Why did this have to fall to her? Didn’t she have enough troubles already? First there was balancing two jobs (one more humiliating than the other), then there was the ridicule she had to endure from the jeers she got from the other teachers from her apparent lack of care for the education of her students, and now she’s been assigned to watch over a criminal and his sister. Normally there would have been another teacher more suited towards the first year curriculum to teach Japanese I, but they wanted to use Sadayo as a common link for the siblings.

She released another heavy sigh as a well-built teacher sauntered towards her with a sympathetic smile.

“What a troublesome situation,” the male teacher remarked, stopping in his tracks and she paused as well.

“I can’t believe they pushed someone with a record on me and expect me to babysit at the same time. A male teacher would be better suited for this…” Sadayo said.

“Why in the world was someone like that admitted here,” he agreed. Then he perked up and smiled. “But you gotta admit, it’s kinda sweet that his little sister wanted to tag along. If ya look at it in a certain way, she’s just tryin’ to look after her big brother and make sure that he’s going to be okay.”

“But still…” Sadayo continued. It was true, she did have a certain amount of sympathy for Hikari Kurusu. If anything, Sadayo wished that she had someone who would stand by her side no matter the cost. Especially now. “In the end, it was the principal’s decision. I was told that it was for the school’s reputation.”

The other teacher scowled. “I would’ve thought that my volleyball team has contributed more than enough to cover that.”

“That’s certainly true,” Sadayo admitted without a hint of a smile.

“Be careful, OK,” he warned her with a gentle tone. “Then again, if anything were to happen, I’d kick out a student like that right away. Though I would feel bad for his sister, all things considered.”

“Well it’s her fault for stepping in where she doesn’t belong. Honestly, I keep wishing that he’d just end up not coming to school.” Sadayo hung her head slightly, bringing back to mind the anger that all but flew from the girl’s eyes before they left. On the outside, the Kurusu girl was calm. But definitely not inside. If Akira Kurusu hadn’t come to Shujin under these terms, Sadayo wouldn’t have to deal with this. Especially not the feelings of shame caused by that gaze. “Still, that isn’t something I should be saying as a teacher…” At least the brother appeared to be the more rational of the two. But who knew how long THAT was going to last?

“Well, I should be returning to practice,” the male teacher said.

Sadayo perked her head up. “Oh, right. The tournament’s coming up, isn’t it?”

He smiled and clenched his fists. “Hehe, having such high expectations placed on you by others is quite a problem in itself. We’ll have to work hard to make up for the track team too.”

“Yes…that’s true.”

The male teacher began to walk off before he paused and turned to Sadayo. “You know, in a way, I kinda sympathize with Kurusu-chan.”

“What about her?” Sadayo asked.

“Since her brother is a delinquent, she has expectations put on her to behave and carry the burden for both of them. If she behaves well, then it might benefit Kurusu and bolster his reputation. That’ll probably put a lot of stress on her.”

Sadayo nodded, wondering where he was going with this.

“Maybe I could help you out a bit. Check up on her every now and then, act as your go between for you two.”

“Well, I’d appreciate the help,” Sadayo admitted, although she couldn’t shake the funny feeling in her stomach when he offered. “But why would you bother? What about the tournament?”

The teacher laughed, unaware of Sadayo’s unease. “Hey, if she’s interested volleyball, then it won’t be a problem. I can just recruit her and give her the role and support she needs during her time here. That kid might even learn from her example and cooperate. Why don’t you mention my offer to Kurusu-chan next time you see her?”

Then he walked off and Sadayo did the same. A teacher should encourage her students to take pride in their school and join clubs that would be helpful for their futures. But Sadayo couldn’t shake the idea that maybe it wouldn’t be a good idea to mention this. It would be helpful to have another teacher help her out, especially during this time, but having HIS help might not be the best idea. Not with all those rumors and nobody going against him.

***

On the bright side, we were out of that school. But on the other hand, the traffic jam wasn’t letting us get any closer to the café. Sakura-san, steaming underneath his white fedora, made his disapproval clear.

“Traffic’s not moving at all… You two are taking the train starting tomorrow.” He growled. I fidgeted in my spot within the safe confines of the backseat, hugging my favorite copy of “The Story of King Arthur and His Knights” close. Even though I didn’t bring a book in the school, that didn’t mean that I didn’t stash one away in the car. “…So how was it?” Sakura-san asked, his tone changing to a more conversational air. “The school, I mean. Think you can manage?”

“It seems fun,” Big Brother answered, causing me to smile. So he was looking at this optimistically, or at least salvaging whatever positivity he gleaned from our time out. That was a comfort at least.

Sakura-san only looked as exhausted as Kawakami-sensei did. “Do you even understand your situation…? Still, you were expelled once already. To think you’d re-enroll at a different one. It’s not like anyone will be sympathetic with you.” He sighed. “…If that’s what it was like at school, people might say stuff about me in the future too… What a troublesome –” He paused and turned towards me. “What about you? What did you think?”

“It was fine. A little nervous for tomorrow, but fine,” I said. Because really, that’s all I could say in honesty. I wasn’t going to start whining and throwing a fit. A knight never turned their back on a mission or their king. Going to this school would be the wasteland I tread upon and the threats towards my brother will be the “dragons” I will slay. Of course it sounds more dramatic and heroic in my head when in reality things will be a bit different. Still, I’m not going to show weakness, nerves or not.

“Why did you take us in?” Big Brother asked. An innocent enough question, but Sakura-san tucked his fedora closer over his face and fidgeted in his seat.

“I was asked to do it, and I just…happened to agree to it.” He waved a hand. “I’ve already been paid for it too, after all.”

The radio announcer declared that there was another subway accident, causing more delays for those driving. Upon hearing even more reports of these accidents, I wasn’t too keen on entrusting our safety via the subway to and from school. But as we didn’t have any other choice, and we would probably be late anyway if Sakura-san did drive us to school instead with all this incessant traffic, we were going to. So we would have to hope that fate didn’t have anything too harrowing in mind for us. At least not enough to get us killed.

***

Later that night, there was an update about the accident. Just like the one reported yesterday, despite the injuries from all sides, there weren’t any casualties and the conductor survived the ordeal like the other one did. However, there was a common link that Sae Niijima couldn’t ignore: neither of the conductors had any memory of speeding up nor could they explain why they acted the way they did. Her superior advised her to not worry too much about the incidents since it fell outside their jurisdiction, but she still couldn’t cease the alarm bells within her.

She left her superior’s office and headed towards the stairs leading outside the law firm. Waiting for her at the base of the steps was a young man, a senior in high school. Instead of dressing in the normal attire of his classmates, he wore a brown long coat and attire more becoming of an established adult within society.

“Did you ask for me? Is it a case?” The young man, Goro Akechi, asked of her as she descended towards him.

“Not quite. I want your opinion on something.” Sae answered.

“Sure. Your judgement is quite often correct, though.” He followed her with a hint of a gleam in his eyes, although his smile remained polite much like his speech. “Can we discuss this over sushi, perhaps? You are making a student work late, after all.”

Without a glance or trace of humor, Sae complied. “Conveyor belt only.”

“Aw…” Goro Akechi pouted and slumped his posture. At least there was sushi to be enjoyed.

***

By the time we got back to the café, it was dark and Sakura-san hadn’t been able to open the café, a fact in which he stated but shrugged off. When Big Brother and I went to our rooms, Sakura-san issued Big Brother a journal he needed to write in and hand over to Sakura-san so that it could be used as a record of his time here. Sakura-san told him just to write whatever so long as it didn’t get him or me into trouble and he’ll ask for it later. Then he handed one to me. Compared to Big Brother’s more formal, black journal, this one was light pink and had cute, fluffy hamsters dancing across the cover.

After Sakura-san gave it to me, he tugged his fedora over his face and mumbled. “Your parents mentioned that…you liked to write so…enjoy. You don’t have to show me anything but…yeah.” He coughed and headed towards the door. “Just don’t cause any trouble and you’ll be fine. Got it?” Without waiting for a reply, he left as his cellphone rang.

“Good for you,” Big Brother said with a chuckle, peering at the notebook over my shoulder.

I was too stunned to say anything. I flipped through the pages, all white with pink lines and tiny hamsters dancing along the edges. A grumpy old man like him, maybe a little older than my dad, went into a store and bought this for me? Even though it wasn’t necessary? Just imagining the scenario almost made me laugh out loud until I chanced upon a yellow sticky note on the inside of the back cover.

“If you need anything, let me know. –Sakura”

Big Brother and I smiled.